I get all of this - spend so much time thinking about my body/appearance, but don't want to express out loud because it seems silly. Started seeing a counselor when it hit me, this is having an impact on my day. Definitely not at radical acceptance, rather more this is how things are. And being so interested in fashion isn't helpful!
I’m so glad I saw this in my feed! I quit instagram years ago and used to follow you. I relate a lot to this. When I couldn’t fit into some of my favorite vintage dresses anymore, it felt like a bigger failing because it’s not like that dress could easily be replaced. It was like I lost something special and that made ME less special. Not a healthy mindset.
You’re not alone, and I look forward to following you again!
"It was like I lost something special and that made ME less special." -- OOF yes I felt this a lot. I felt like if I wasn't showing up at the function with the most interesting outfit with the most interesting story, then who was I? Why would anyone want to talk to me? etc. Not great!
Given your history (which as a long-time IG follower I had no idea about), it must be incredibly difficult if not downright terrifying to write these posts, but I am so moved by them and so grateful that you are putting these thoughts out there.
I hated that period when ‘everyone’ was telling us women to get off the pill. I feel so much better on it and now new research shows that it actually protects us from ovarian and uterus cancer. So here’s to sticking to what we feel is right for our own bodies 💕
Thank you so much for sharing this! I feel like you are reading my mind?! Illness, peri-menopause, death of both parents etc= changed body, & big belly. I can totally relate, especially re the loss of "pretty" & the financial & spatial/storage concerns re collecting various sizes of vintage. Looking forward to Part 2 - & I will look at your reading recommendations. Take care :)
Thank you for this. Your experience is so familiar even in its uniqueness.
I hate how long so many of us spend thinking about ourselves, our bodies, in these toxic ways, without realising that it's not just us, it's systemic. So few women are happy with their bodies even when they fit the narrow parameters of "pretty". Why is that? Why do we have such narrow ideas of what constitutes "healthy" or "flattering"? (For so many reasons covered by many of the excellent books in your footnotes. Not to mention Maintenance Phase.)
For what it's worth I think you look happy and comfortable in that photo. I like those pants on you. And why is saying something's comfy so often a bad thing? Ugh.
I get all of this - spend so much time thinking about my body/appearance, but don't want to express out loud because it seems silly. Started seeing a counselor when it hit me, this is having an impact on my day. Definitely not at radical acceptance, rather more this is how things are. And being so interested in fashion isn't helpful!
This is how things are is a huge step though. No longer viewing our bodies as a site of shame is a long journey.
I’m so glad I saw this in my feed! I quit instagram years ago and used to follow you. I relate a lot to this. When I couldn’t fit into some of my favorite vintage dresses anymore, it felt like a bigger failing because it’s not like that dress could easily be replaced. It was like I lost something special and that made ME less special. Not a healthy mindset.
You’re not alone, and I look forward to following you again!
"It was like I lost something special and that made ME less special." -- OOF yes I felt this a lot. I felt like if I wasn't showing up at the function with the most interesting outfit with the most interesting story, then who was I? Why would anyone want to talk to me? etc. Not great!
Given your history (which as a long-time IG follower I had no idea about), it must be incredibly difficult if not downright terrifying to write these posts, but I am so moved by them and so grateful that you are putting these thoughts out there.
Oh you know I am here for this. Yes to all of it. ❤️
I hated that period when ‘everyone’ was telling us women to get off the pill. I feel so much better on it and now new research shows that it actually protects us from ovarian and uterus cancer. So here’s to sticking to what we feel is right for our own bodies 💕
Hear, hear!
Thank you so much for sharing this! I feel like you are reading my mind?! Illness, peri-menopause, death of both parents etc= changed body, & big belly. I can totally relate, especially re the loss of "pretty" & the financial & spatial/storage concerns re collecting various sizes of vintage. Looking forward to Part 2 - & I will look at your reading recommendations. Take care :)
Thank you for this. Your experience is so familiar even in its uniqueness.
I hate how long so many of us spend thinking about ourselves, our bodies, in these toxic ways, without realising that it's not just us, it's systemic. So few women are happy with their bodies even when they fit the narrow parameters of "pretty". Why is that? Why do we have such narrow ideas of what constitutes "healthy" or "flattering"? (For so many reasons covered by many of the excellent books in your footnotes. Not to mention Maintenance Phase.)
For what it's worth I think you look happy and comfortable in that photo. I like those pants on you. And why is saying something's comfy so often a bad thing? Ugh.
And this is how I ended up at Gudrun Sjoden...
thank you for this!!!